011 452 4042 daretolove@mweb.co.za

Question: is it possible to give love to a child and its never enough? No matter how many cuddles, how much time, how much love and they still seem to show signs of clinging and an empty love tank?

Yes this is possible in certain specific situations where something else is happening.

1. The child is needing love from one parent who is absent too much. They seem to cling to the available parent who may love them but it never seems to be sufficient.

2. The child has experienced something that undermines his/her security for example they were involved in a hijacking, house robbery or similar trauma, or a parent or close family member died.

3. The parents are going through a divorce or separation and the child has lost the parent who left and possibly also “lost” the remaining parent who could now be less emotionally available, having to shoulder all the responsibilities of working, running a home and parenting.

4. The child is battling to process how they feel about a specific situation for instance worrying about school performance, feeling pressurised by an overly busy extra mural programme, negotiating difficulties in friendships or worrying about a pending move to another city or country.

To support a child in any of the above situations, emotional processing needs to take place. Parents can make sure they help a child to identify and talk through their emotions (calmly and don’t overdo it) or get help from a professional who specialises in counselling children.